The 80’S Cult Classic..That Made Killing Cool

The classic teen comedy, Mean Girls was released into theaters a decade ago, it coined the phrase “so fetch”, and is probably Lindsay Lohan’s most famous role. Long before Regina George was terrorizing her high school peers, there was a different Queen B, she went by the name Heather Chandler, and unlike Regina who gets redeemed at the end of the film, Chandler is murdered by her “best friend”, played by a young Winona Ryder. Heather Chandler is the ultimate villain, she is the bitch from middle school everyone wanted to punch in the face, and the bully from the playground in elementary that pushed you down the slide. There is nothing redeemable about her character, and this is why when she is murdered, it is difficult to feel any sort of remorse for her. 

Heathers is a dark comedy about a girl that desperately wants to get out of the “it” crowd, because she sees how superficial, mean and nasty they are. They believe they are superior to the entire school, and spend their days tormenting innocent classmates. She gets into a romantic relationship with the “new kid” in school, and together they begin murdering a few of their classmates, and staging them as suicides. At the end of the movie he attempts to kill the entire school, because he believes that the only place all social cliques can get along is in heaven. This is where the film gets deep…even though CJ is indeed insane, and killing the whole school in an attempt to prove a point is uncalled for; he is right, in a way high school does show how people of different beliefs, backgrounds, and social status’s will never genuinely get along. This goes for adulthood, humans form bonds with others that are like themselves, and a significant amount form judgments on others based on their appearance. 

The characters that fall victim to CJ’s schemes are the assholes that he believes had nothing to offer the school, but vulgar jokes and constant stupidity. I do admit I have to fast forward through the jocks getting shot, because it was a bit too gruesome for my taste, but the funeral scene was classic. I love Heathers dark humor, and deep points in regards to human behavior. I wish modern day teen comedies were this cool.

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Let’s Point That Finger Again

That adorable, angelic, precious baby you once held in your arms, because it was crying has now transformed into a rebellious, music blasting teenager. A teenager that wants nothing to do with you. A person that is smoking pot, having sex, and prancing around in clothing you do not approve of.

What went wrong? Who the hell is that monster in your kitchen? You read every psychology book there was ever written on how to raise the “perfect” child, you surrounded your child with responsible, educated adults, and provided them with a stable home. That deviant monster could not be a result of how you raised it. You are the epitome of human perfection. You did everything right. Their outrageous behavior must be a result of something else-hmmmm I think I know what that something is. Kim Kardashian, Lindsay Lohan, Paris Hilton, these girls are complete whores, and your child is infatuated by them. They must be the reason why your child is acting out.

This may sound lame, but the reality is people often blame entertainment for their childs poor behavior. Come on get real. Kim Kardashian is not raising your child, YOU ARE! If parents did something called parent their children would not go inside of the cocoon and turn into a monster. Does the media have some effect on our society?? Of course it does. Children, especially girls are effected by what magazines and television project to them. That magic little box in your living room can decide what is pretty what is ugly, why you need the newest version of the car you are driving, why your not thin enough- the list can go on, however if parents stopped pointing the finger at that little box or at celebrities they could possibly face the fact that their childrens behavior is due to their lack of parenting! EVERY teenager will be exposed to drugs, and sex. How they handle the situation all depends upon how they were raised. Do their peers influence them? Yes, but they have a minimal amount of influence if they were raised by strong parents.

There are many single parents, and parents that have to work long hours in order to provide for their children. I empathize with you, and give you a significant amount of credit. It must be difficult trying to raise children, and maintaining a job. I give you all a big high five, because it is well deserved. This does not excuse you from being a bad parent, you still have to spend time with your child, and do this thing called discipline them when they misbehave. It is also up to you to explain what is right and what is wrong to your child, you instill their morals and values not entertainment.

Entertainment is a business, it is about making money. In the 1950’s America was exposed to darling, perfect upper middle class, white families like the Cleavers. Daddy went to work, while the mother cleaned all day, and still managed to look like she was going to compete in a Miss. America pageant. She was so happy, and delighted to spend her days dusting and cooking apple pies. This is what we loved to see. In 2013, we are addicted to trash television. Why? It is entertaining! It is NOT real life, it is fabricated, exaggerated and funny. I highly doubt Paris Hilton is a complete moron, same with Kim Kardashian. Society puts these women down, because of jealousy. Who wouldnt want to get $30,000 just to send out a damn tweet! Who wouldnt want to be filthy rich, for having zero talent? I do not think these women are great role models, but I also believe nobody in the entertainment industry is a healthy role model.

If parents spent time with their children, and actually parented how much cocaine Lindsay Lohan shoves up her nose would not matter. Kim Kardashian’s need for attention, and the tape of her getting pounded by Ray J would not matter. KIMMMMY