Why I HATE Modern TV

I really cannot fathom how people can sit there and watch modern television. Television has become unrealistic, over materialistic, and infested with talentless idiots. Television used to be good. It was more than entertainment. Roseanne is one of my favorite television shows because it was groundbreaking. For the first time, America was exposed to a sitcom which contained an unconventional leading lady along with a  working class family. In a nutshell…they were fucking relatable. They struggled financially, they made fun of their weight, their children were snarky little brats. They seemed real. I like reality. The truth is funny.

I also dig Married With Children because it pushed boundaries, and I LOVE LOVE anything that pushed the envelope. I believe great comedy is limitless.Al bundy was a satire of many American men. One of my favorite articles, I’m Still Living in Al Bundy’s America written by Walter  Mosley explained how no man that has been married for 20 years is so excited to go home and bang his wife. Married with Children just said it. It is insulting but I can see the truth beneath the insult. I also believe no woman that has been married for 20 years is excited to have sex with the man she’s been with 10,000,000 times. I think some men fail to see that.

Today, television is infested with a bunch of exaggeration. I hate reality tv, because the people on it are just a bunch of hot messes with no authentic talent. They’re not even that good looking. Most of them look like they work in strip clubs where they serve lobster for $4.99. They’ll do anything just to get attention and sound like they blew their principal to score a high school diploma.

Thoughts? P.S. I know my grammar sucks.

xoxoxoxo

https://twitter.com/JaclynAshley79

 

 

 

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Red Sweat Shirt Dumbass

I always have crazy titles, because they make my blog posts appear interesting. I guess you can call it “false” advertising, but whatever, today’s post is about a guy in a red sweat shirt.

I am very much attracted to funny men, because they are usually ballsy, know how to have a good time, and I find it easy to open up to them. I am one of those people that has issues with allowing people to get to know me on an emotional level, because it makes me feel powerless. I have some issues…but don’t we all? Anyways, lets call this idiot RSSD. RSSD seemed really cool, but unfortunately, he made the six year old selling lemonade on the street corner appear mature. We only hung out twice, and it was clearly just that, there was nothing romantic behind our hang outs, we just shared one similar interest, and I am not going to say what it is. The second time we hung out he had the nerve to sit there and stick earphones in his ears, who does that???? I should have just walked out, but I didn’t, I stayed, and I am going to turn a negative experience with a dipshit into comedic inspiration..:)

RSSD is a brat, and at one point so was I. Let me explain, I grew up spoiled, and my parents always catered to me, and gave me more than enough, but eventually I grew out of that spoiled brat obnoxious give me my way or the highway mentality. Rotten people are drawn to those types, and who the hell wants to attract that? RSSD wants what he wants when he wants it and when he doesn’t get his way he acts out like a little boy. Like I did as a child when I threw a temper tantrum because  my parents wouldn’t get my a toy I wanted.

RSSD only wanted to hang out with me, because his dick wanted to chill inside of my vagina. I was definitely attracted to him, but wasn’t ready for that yet, and thats when his true colors started to show. That’s when he acted like a child, was in a pissy ass mood, and stuck those ear phones in his ears. My advice to RSSD is if you only want sex be straight forward about it, because you will attract another girl that just wants sex, and then you don’t have to act like a little boy, because you will get your way. My second piece of advice is you’re not 19 anymore, you are a grown man, and should know better by now. You should know that you need to RESPECT women, because clearly you don’t.

Happy Hump Day

XXXOXXXO

Keep It Classy When You Tell Someone To Shut The F*** Up!

Happy New Years Everyone :). This is officially my first post for 2015, and I am going to make it an okay one, because my second post will contain something quite funny, and entertaining. Anyways, sometimes telling someone to shut the fuck off is rather rude, and just might make you appear classless and mean, and we wouldn’t want that now do we? I have come up with a few different ways to inform someone that they need to pipe the fuck down without saying the word fuck. If you have any please feel free to leave some comments below :).

finger

1. If someone is talking to you and what they’re saying is driving you insane simply ignore them. This works well if that person is trying to bring you down, or is having a blast amusing themselves by attempting to make you feel inferior to them. You don’t have time to deal with people’s insecurities, nor do you have time to fight with them about what they’re doing simply ignore it.

2. Walk away.Yes, get up and walk away from the situation. It will probably leave the person dumbfounded and baffled, but who cares. Just put one foot in front of the other and soon you will be walking out of the door 🙂

3. Say something witty but do it with a smile. When people try to attack you, or enjoy picking on you to get a reaction, they are trying to make you blow up in their faces, and usually this is so they can play the victim card, and if you do go all Hulk on their asses you will pay a price. So smile like a step-ford wife and say something witty.

Love you all and love your comments!!! tweet me @jaclynashley79 

I Am OVER Facebook

Facebook has become a place for people to snoop, and find out pointless information about one another. It has become a network infested with lies and false personas. It is a way for people to find out what happened to an old fling, or their secret high school crush. It is a place where relationships begin and die. It is a social network that I am sick of. Facebook invades my privacy; it links up people from my phone-book and places them on my “people you may know” list at the top of the screen. There are plenty of people in my phone-book I do not want to be friends with, because I like to keep it friends and family only. I do not want to grant certain people access into my personal life.

I am also over people posting political memes which end up in pointless heated debates. I have seen grown ass people bicker about how horrible Obama is and how he is destroying this country. I simply unfollow the post. In fact, I have become accustomed to unfollowing TONS of people, because they pop up in my news feed too often, or post too many selfies, or annoy me.

I love Twitter, because it allows you interact with people you normally would not. I also believe people appear wittier and do not constantly post obnoxious comments, or whine about their relationships. This goes for the people I follow. Of course there are Twitter idiots, trolls and people tweeting dumb shit. I do not follow them.

Why don’t you just un-friend the annoying folks from Facebook? Because I do not want to make anyone mad and some happen to be friends :/.

THOUGHTS

Victims

“When someone is mean to me I just make them a victim in my next book- Mary Higgins Clark

I am over 9,000 words in now, and unfortunately experiencing writers block, therefore I wish to express my thoughts through this blog. I feel like writing about random topics helps provoke my thoughts. I found the quote above, and thought it was quite interesting, because originally I wanted to get back at people that did me wrong and make them victims in my story, however now I have come to conclusion that I want to vilify them and than redeem them. I think people that are assholes are that way because somewhere along the line they were victimized. I also believe that I was just a punching bag for these idiots, in no way shape or form does it excuse their lack of compassion, and rude behavior but you know what we are all people. We all bleed blood, and cry tears. That is one point I hope people to will see in my story, its important to forgive people because if you dont they had the last laugh, and what fun is that?