Beauty & The Beast is blahed up.

I find the flaws in everything. You show me the perfect house with the cleanest white picket fence, and I will find the one cracked paint chip at the bottom of the fence that leads into the dirt. Mhm. I bleed cynicism.

But anyone with a quarter of a brain could easily pinpoint how flawed this “fairytale” is. On the surface it tries to convey this message of how beauty comes from within, and that is all fine and dandy but it does a really shitty job at doing that. Ugh.

First of all, the spoiled Prince gets a knock on his door in the middle night; he opens it and here is  this haggard looking woman who offers a rose to him in exchange for a place to sleep that night, because it was freezing cold. He tells her no, because he is repulsed by her appearance, and she tells him but beauty comes from within, he still says no, and poof she turns hot, and then he wants to apologize, typical dude, right? Well, she sees he is full of shit, and casts a spell on him which turns him into a beast, and all the castle workers into dishes, and candles.

Um, if some weirdo knocked on my door in the middle of the night, and offered me a rose, I would slam the door in their face. Unless that weirdo was a dog.

Anyways, Bell is this really intelligent female character who also happens to be beautiful, which is really refreshing. She breaks a stereotype, cool. Bell falls in love with the beast who screams at her, throws stuff at her, and basically keeps her hostage. This shows that a woman who seems to have it all on the surface could be a complete screwball underneath.

At the end of the movie, the spell is broken, because she fell in love with him. This is total bs. She changed him, and no girl, or guy should have to change a crazy ass beast into a “good guy”. You shouldn’t accept their inappropriate behavior, or feel obligated to fix them. Thoughts?

I am performing Sunday night at 8pm, at the Endzone 8420 Lankershim Blvd, Sun Valley, CA 91352

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#MCM Thought Catalog Writers!

Happy Monday ALL!

This week’s MCMS focuses on Thought Catalog and three amazing writers! You should check out their latest posts 🙂

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http://thoughtcatalog.com/sean-curtis/2015/03/15-disney-quotes-that-will-ruin-your-day/

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http://thoughtcatalog.com/justin-demarco/2015/03/the-20-people-that-will-change-your-life-in-your-20s/

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http://thoughtcatalog.com/lance-pauker/2015/03/10-graphs-that-sum-up-turning-25/

Maleficent Is Magnificant

I never thought I would admit this, but Disney is beginning to get it right.

Do not get me wrong, most of us were enchanted by Disney films throughout our childhood, because there were pretty princesses, music and a happy ending. We were conditioned to seek out a happy ending. I never saw anything wrong with any of this until I entered college and participated in a media course which explained all the bullshit Disney instills into their films, the damsel in distress, the fact that all of the good characters have Caucasian features and all of the princesses are incredibly thin. They are always so damn giddy; let’s get real would you be singing with mice if you spent your days in old, torn up clothing sweeping the floor like Cinderella? Probably not. You would probably be smoking your life away and easing your pain with some Jack Daniels. 

This time around Disney struck gold, because Maleficant was an excellent film. For the first time they showed audience members how true love does not necessarily mean romantic love. They showed that Maleficant was actually an anti-hero who happened to get burned, because of greed, however she gets redeemed at the end of the film. I think redemption is always wonderful in films, because the majority of us have redeemable traits; we just fuck up time to time. Angelina Jolie was captivating as always, the makeup was great and it was difficult to not fall in love with her character.

The happy ending did occur, but it came about through a more realistic approach. Sleeping Beauty does get her prince at the end, and Maleficant defeats the evil King, however it lacked the cheesy nonsense incorporated into most Disney films. This film is a must see! 

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Everything In The World Is About Sex Except Sex is about Power

Oscar Wilde’s wise words are indeed correct. At least in my opinion. Let’s take a look at advertising, shall we; what is the easiest way to get a consumer’s attention? Sex. It is simple, eye catching, provocative, and time after time it continues to generate positive results. If it did not work, companies would not use it to sell the dipshit consumer their new scent of deodorant, or their new cologne. Or whatever else they want to convince somebody they NEED. 

Sex is also being used in the Entertainment industry, how many times do we hear previous generations complaining about how television contains a ridiculous amount of sex? We hear people annoyed ALL the time. Most of these people are angry mothers, pissed off because the squeaky clean teenager their tween daughter idolizes isnt so clean after all. 

Sunday night, Miley Cyrus performed at the 2013 MTV Video Music Awards acting a little aloof, and somewhat obscene. The internet went into a frenzy posting memes, photographs, articles and count downs poking fun at the former Disney starlet. Cyrus has been acting a little crazy, I am sure she is experimenting with drugs, partying, drinking, having sex, the works. 

I want you to close your eyes for a moment, let’s go back in time to when you were 16 years old. Now let’s pretend you are famous, people idolize you, and you are filthy rich. You cannot have certain friends, because you are under a strict contract that forbids you to be seen with certain people or do certain things. If you get caught with a cigarette in your hand or appear stoned your cookie cutter image could be destroyed…FOREVER! You are basically a big corporations puppet. Now lets flash forward to a few years. You are now 21 years old, your strings have been cut off, you are famous, filthy rich and have the world in the palm of your hands. How would you be acting? Remember the 21 year old version of yourself, the younger, dumber, immature version of what you grew up to be. I am sure you knew someone that experimented with drugs, drank too much and had the occasional casual sex partner. It is called sewing your wild oats and most people are a little crazy during their youth. It is NORMAL!

Miley’s outrageous performance did exactly what it intended to do, it put her in the spotlight, it stole the show even if people were saying negative things about her there is no such thing as bad publicity. Miley having the media poke fun at her ass, calling her a drug addict, crazy whatever terms they choose to use is a whole lot better than ignoring her. 

Here is where everything ties into Oscar Wilde’s fine words: sex is about power. We use sex to control people. We use sex to sell people products they dont necessarily need, we create a problem than give them a solution by incorporating sex. Ladies use this diet pill you will lose 15 pounds in two weeks!!! Flashes to a sexy model running in central park. Men use AXE!! Flashes to a guy getting trampled by a bunch of hot models on a beach, all because his arm pits smell like AXE. You can’t just have sex with anyone, you want the chiseled form of pure perfection you see on your screen and in order to get that person you need to use that product. It sounds silly but it works. If it did not work we would see more homely looking people dressed in jeans and a t-shirt informing us of why we need this product. We do not see this because it is not a fantasy that is many people’s reality.