Are you happy with who you are? Confident? Intelligent?
If you said yes, you probably intimidate some people. People often fear what they can, and will never be.
I would like to dedicate this blog post to “nice” people, particularly men.
I dislike many “nice” guys because one too many have fucked me over, or used me. “Nice” guys are not super nice; they are conniving users. I speak of this from my PERSONAL experiences; I AM NOT SAYING YOU CAN’T BE NICE AND LEGIT BE NICE. I am trying to convey my personal experiences with manipulators.
Nice guys often play the pity me, pity me, victim card to make people feel sorry for them, because when they get the fake pat on the back and feel validated. They never see that the pat on the back is temporary and their unhappiness that chills beneath their skin shall remain. Pretending to be a fake, nice person does not get you love; it gives you a false sense of reality. You know what gets you REAL love? Being yourself and being unapologetic about it. When you can be honest with those around you and they still love you; it is love. When someone can put up with all of your flaws, point them out but still hug you, that is love.When someone texts you just to find out how everything is and supports you- it is love. Users sometimes do this until they get what they want, then they move on, because all they were doing was giving you the same temporary approval they seek themselves.
I don’t play the victim card, because I am way too old for that shit. I figured out along time ago that playing the role of the helpless, dumb victim attracts people who are just like that! They have no interest in saving you.
I am often painted as the villain. I can be stand offish, unfriendly and people mistake that as snobbery. I am stand offish until I feel a sense of safety. I don’t think I am better than anyone, and I am far from judgmental. I just have to observe. I hate most people, and I am not very trusting. People do not go awwwwwwwww poor Jaclyn when they see me. I do not expect them to.
Now there are people particularly males who love to make everyone around them feel sorry for them, and if I happen to go to toe with them, I am vilified. I don’t think this is fair.
So, mirror, mirror on the wall who is the true victim after all?
Saying stuff like “you’ll never go out with me, or girls like you don’t like me, or nobody likes me, or I am not good enough for you, and so forth” are often signs of conniving behavior. The guy is trying to make you feel sorry for him so you have sex with him. You do not need to be placed on a pedestal by anyone, because if you love yourself, you are already on one.