Why I DIG Paris Hilton

You are probably thinking what the fuck. Why did I even click on this blog entry has this girl gone made? No, I have not. I actually dig Paris Hilton, because  at one point she was the talk of the town, and although she got caught with cocaine, she never checked into rehab, or bitched about being famous. I think too many celebrities bitch about their fame. I understand that being famous is not easy, because people bother you, take photos and tear you apart just to sell magazines, but I also believe the celebrities that are always seen in the tabloids want to be there. There are plenty of A listers that are rarely seen in those skanky tabloids, because they dont hang out at spots where photographers will be!! I also think if you are playing the fame game you cannot throw a bitch fit every time the dice is rolled not in your favor. 

I think Paris Hilton owns her fame. She doesnt really give a fuck about what people think about her. She hasnt  had an unsuccessful marriage like many other celebs, and she seems to unapologetic about being who she is. I think she plays up the dumb blonde image for television, I think if I were to sit down and have a conversation with her I wouldnt be disappointed. Television loves stereotypes, and its kind of depressing. She was also an easy target at one point because lets face it she is famous for being famous, grew up privileged and doesnt really have to work.   She also has legs for days and that naturally slim body. She can probably eat like a horse, and not put on a pound its not fair. With that being said, yes I totally dig Paris Hilton!

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MYOB-Remember This Acronym?

“I found your nose, it was in my business again” Have you seen this meme? 

It reminded me of a post I wrote in regards to curious people versus flat out fucking nosy people that just want to be in everyone’s business. There are so many people in the world that cannot seem to just mind their own business. They think everyone else’s life pertains to them, and sorry sunshine, but it does not! Some of you may play your nosiness as curiosity or concern. Sorry bitches you are not fooling ANYONE here! Here is a list of stuff that nosy ass people tend to do.

  • They try to get in your business by playing off the “I am worried about you or concerned about you” card. They may ask were you really sick the other day? Are you feeling okay? Or something like that to figure out why you missed work, or ditched class. Solution: Give them a vague one word answer, because it is the polite way to tell someone to shut the fuck up.
  • They tell you everything about their lives in hopes of figuring out every last detail about yours. Still not fooling anyone. I only act like an idiot, but I am secretly a genius. Solution: Just listen to them and when they try to get into your personal life change the subject.
  • They try to make YOU look like the nosy one, mhm yes I have had this happen to me before. They want to know everything about everyone, and have fake social media profiles in order to snoop yet I am the nosy one in everyones business. Solution: I ignored their snide remarks, because they were not worth my time.
  • They Facebook stalk you and go snooping at all your friend’s profiles too, but they are open about it like it is something to be proud of! We all snoop don’t deny it but we keep the juice to ourselves! Solution: Don’t post anything juicy on Facebook be boring it will keep the lurkers away.

So, I am going to be posting more videos- if you havent seen it yet my guest post was posted on Monday: http://longawkwardpause.com/2014/10/06/if-kimye-made-a-music-video/  on Longawkwardpause.com I am thinking of doing Sunday Rant Vlogs along with more parodies and Snarky TV. 

People I DONT Feel Sorry For!

What is up my snarky peeps? This is a special post to make your Sunday a weeeee bit snarkier :)! For the most, I dont really have alot of sympathy for people, because most people know the solutions to their problems, but they fail to solve their issues because playing the victim card makes the game appear much better! Here are people I DO NOT FEEL SORRY FOR!

1. People complaining about how broke they are, but they are only working a part time job 15 hours a week, and refuse to go out and find more work. Keep complaining have fun, because that will definitely add zeros in your bank account.

2. Overweight people that complain about how lethargic they feel, and how horrible their life is because of their weight, but all they do is eat Snickers bars and Burger King, and refuse to exercise. 

3. Women that are always bashing men and complaining about horrible they are meanwhile they only date assholes. THEY CHOOSE TO DATE THEM! YOU CHOOSE WHO YOU DATE! (At least in America!)

4. Girls in their late 20’s that get played by their significant others. This is insensitive of me, but I think when you reach a certain age you wake up and have this magical thing called experience nestled under your belt, and with that comes a new wave of wisdom, and with this you are able to determine who the assholes are and who the genuine men are. Teenage girls getting their hearts broken, I feel your pain, but grown ass women suck it up, you should know better by now!

5. Big DREAMERS that get mad when they fail, because they expected everyone else to build the fucking dream for them! If you have a dream, good, I have plenty, but I build my own dreams, I dont expect people to come on in and make them for me. Don’t cry when it doesnt work out, because you wanted someone else to do all the work for you and they didnt!

I HATE COMMERCIALS!

commercialmeme

Today’s Snarky ass blog post is going to be about how I HATE COMMERCIALS! Over the years, they have gotten worse! At least when I was a kid, we had the energizer battery which had a touch of entertaining value, and Gushers commercials where kids heads turned into fruits –https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ngwSbRDiIjA but now advertisements are down right ANNOYING! The actors are dancing around because they are wearing Payless shoes, or they are whipping their perfect hair around, because of an amazing shampoo, when in reality their fabulous hair is as a result of hair extensions NOT some $5.99 shampoo!

I understand advertisements are needed. I get it, but why are companies coming up with these awful ideas for commercials? Who the fuck is writing this shit? Who thinks it is good enough to put on air?

Commercials need to be entertaining if they want people to sit there and watch them and not automatically click the damn button to go to a different channel until that nonsense is gone.

Tell me some of your favorite commercials that ever aired!